We’ve all banished our partner to the spare room when their snoring is causing us sleepless nights. But what happens when separate beds, and even separate rooms, becomes the norm?
Two in six British couples now sleep in separate beds, found research. And over half of which claim they actually sleep in separate rooms.
All this is fine if you’re happy with the arrangement, but the problems start when these bedtime habits start affecting your relationship.
And the research found two thirds of those sleeping separately felt it had negatively affected their relationship.
The study, polled 2,010 men and women aged 18 and over in a co-habiting relationship from across Nigeria and UK.
Of those who admitted it had a negative effect on their relationship, 51 per cent admitted that it had made them feel distant from their partner; whilst 42 per cent explained that it negatively impacted their sex life.
‘Sleeping apart from each other, however valid the initial reason, is never emotionally or psychologically healthy for a couple,’ says Psychologist Donna Dawson .‘It is obvious that the first thing that will suffer is a couple’s sex life, as the couple now need to make a concerted and planned effort to meet up for sex. What is less obvious, though, is the loss of spontaneous cuddling, touching and chatting in bed, which is actually the glue that bonds a couple over the longer term. A lack of this ‘bonding’ can lead to a couple feeling distant from each other. And getting used to not having sex can cause the sex drive in both partners to drop even further, so that you want sex even less. It is far better to try other options first, such as using wax earplugs and an eye-mask if a partner snores or comes in late, and/or buying a bigger bed so that you both have more room in which to move without disturbing each other.’
The research found the reasons for sleeping in different beds ranged from differing bedtime habits (43 per cent), such as going to bed at different times, or one partner preferring to watch TV/read in bed; to one partner snoring (36 per cent), or simply preferring to sleep in separate beds (20 per cent).
However, despite causing issues within the relationship, 86 per cent of respondents admitted they actually have a better night’s sleep when they slept alone.
As much as we like to get the recommended eight hours sleep a night, we’re not sure putting our relationship in jeopardy is the way to go about it.
