And all liars shall go to hell – Rev 21:8.
Again, I’m going to go out on a limb here to talk on a subject
that may not be very popular or nice to Nigerian celebs,
especially the guilty ones. I have said it severally that just
because someone is a celebrity doesn’t mean they are smart.
They may have a talent or skill but many of them are not
smart especially when it involves their finances.
The old saying, “your lies will come back to haunt you” has never been
more true than the recent cases of D’banj, Iyanya and Wizkid
who are being kicked out of their homes after lying they
owned the properties. The residents of blogosphere boulevard
were stunned when the news broke that D’banj got an
eviction notice from his landlord and was also said to be
highly indebted. Yes, it is hard to believe that someone of
D’banj’s status could actually be thrown out of his house. But
for those who know that the Nigerian entertainment industry
is built on lies and more lies, it didn’t come as a surprise or a
case of a cranky landlord. Entertainers are well rehearsed
liars. They are not what they make you believe they are. Even
the upcoming artist with just one song on radio issues a press
release that they’ve bought a mansion in Lekki Phase One and
a Range Sport SUV?
There was a time when it was strongly whispered that Don
Jazzy and his crew owned Club Jonzing until the truth came
out. You must have also heard that D’banj owns Koko
Lounge. My brothers and sisters in habit of believing
everything you hear, I wish you all knew how your favourite
celebs laugh in their closet seeing you swallow the lies like
fufu and draw soup. Let me give an example of how some
artistes can be terrible liars, we were on a tour of five Nigerian
cities with Basketmouth and his then Humour Unlimited
monthly show sponsored by BAT. When we got to Enugu, a
certain artiste was snoring like a broken trailer exhaust pipe in
the bus on our way from the event centre to the hotel. I
tapped him hoping to stir him up to reduce his noise but I
was shocked when he woke up immediately swearing that he
wasn’t snoring, that he was only trying to get our reaction.
Our reaction? After snoring for about 20 minutes with a trail of
saliva from one corner of his mouth to his shirt collar! O’boy
some people can lie in Africa.
Did you hear it on breaking news when Iyanya bought a house
in his dreams? His management must have thought it was a
fantastic promo strategy then. If only they knew that not far
into the future, Iyanya would be dragged by his balls across
the floor of the internet, and that his aggrieved brother would
take to twitter to inform everyone that Iyanya had been
evicted (not from Project shame) from his dream mansion.
Yes, it is double wahala for deadi-bodi and the owner of
deadi-bodi but won’t it be tripple wahala for Oritsefemi and
his management when fans eventually discovered that the
N200m mansion he purportedly bought some months back
was actually bought in his dreams and not in the real world?
playing these gigs to be able to afford a mansion of that
amount? Isn’t it wonderful how naija entertainers think their
fans and everyone else is shallow and gullible? Common
sense should tell every artiste that these lies won’t achieve
anything but hurt their careers in the long run when the truth
is eventually revealed. Like it was revealed this week that
Wizkid’s car hasn’t been paid for. True, some naija musicians
make a lot of money, but not the kind of money they want you
to believe. Does Oritsefemi look the part of a N200m house
owner even with all his body cream? The telco brand
ambassadors who are being coerced into lying about their
endorsement fees can’t make such a preposterous claim not
to talk of someone with no endorsement deal. I shivered when
I saw in some blogs over the week that Genevieve just bought
a house in Ghana for a whopping $4m. This will go down as
the grandmother of all lies told so far. Genny baybay, you
should have asked yourself if there’s any house worth $4m in
the whole of Ghana, except you bought the Ghana National
Theatre which by the way may not be worth $4m. These lies
are getting dumber by the day. The worst thing that can
happen to any man is believing his own lies. If we had a
system where entertainers are taxed for their acquisitions, the
ridiculous and unnecessary lies will stop. They will speak the
truth and nothing but the truth or so help them God.