We all go through our ups and downs during the course of
the day but over the last few years it feels as though our
lives have turned upside down. With so much uncertainty in
our work, drama in the lives of the people we love and and
the speed of change, it seems like stress and anxiety seem
to dominate our day from the moment we get up to the time
we crash on the bed at night.
As I learned to deal with the uncertainty surrounding my
career,I learned some valuable lessons, particularly on how
to deal with stress that I had felt so intensely over the years.
These lessons have helped me be more calm and stress free
for most of my day. Sure, I have tough moments where I feel
so much is on the line, but for most of the day, those
moments don’t bother me as they used to. I sleep better,
have more energy and have a more optimistic view about
life. The uncertainty didn’t go away — I learned to manage it
better.
Here are four ways to have a stress free day:
1. Bring back control . . . to yourself
At the core of our feeling of stress during the day is that so
much of our life is out of control. We leave our home in the
morning feeling stressed at the lack of control we have with
our boss, our customers or our colleagues.We get to work and
there’s a so called “emergency” which forces our day to turn
upside down or we’re given challenges to deal with back at
home with the kids, which we didn’t expect.
The root of so much of our stress is our incessant need to
have some level of control and certainty in our life — from
the situation at work to the coffee shop to the circumstances
at home.
By realizing that while we cannot control the chaos out there
in so many parts of life, what we can control is ourselves.
That we are the masters of: our own mind, the way we think
and the actions we take. That’s the source of our freedom
from stress — an innate ability to redirect our focus from
outside mess to the inside mind.
We can’t control our boss, our customers or even our kids
but what we can control is ourselves. Our own thoughts, our
choices and our actions. This is where we ought be focusing
our mind. By redirecting our attempt to exert control over the
outside life to the goals we wish to accomplish during the
day, we can begin our path to a stress free day.
2. Create certainty before leaving the house
Since most of our day is unpredictable, we need to create a
sense of certainty before leaving the house in the morning.
By getting up a little earlier and following some daily rituals,
we can create that certainty.
Physically moving the body through exercise first thing in the
morning does wonders for increasing the level of positive
energy through natural blood flow. Meditation, prayer,
reciting morning affirmations, kissing the kids, hugging our
spouse or listening to upbeat music or an inspirational
message on Youtube is a great way to create solid seeds in
the mind which we harvest the rest of the day. During my Youth service in Lagos Nigeria, i have headphone filled with inspirng messages and anytime
3. Soak the mind with balanced voices
So many of us encounter toxic voices during the day.
Whether it’s colleagues at work, difficult customers, the
overly emotional people in our lives or sometimes even our
own mind. All these voices make us overthink often
debilitating us from moving forward.
The good news is that emotions are infectious, positive ones
as well as negative ones. Whether it’s smiling at the guy at
the coffee shop or speaking with a friend or loved one during
the day can break the pattern of negative voices, providing
much needed balance in our emotional state. Turning off the
news and tuning in to an inspirational voice on YouTube or a
podcast can also help us balance out the voices of self
doubt and stress during the day.
4. Take more action
Moving forward on a project at work, a goal to get more fit
or making the call to a new customer, taking action makes
us feel better because we get some semblance of control
back into our life. For those focused moments of energy, we
get to be in charge of our little universe that allows us the
freedom to create, build and share the potential that we have
inside of us.
It doesn’t have to be large scale action. It can be as small
and simple. Make a call. Send an email. Write a
presentation. Visit a customer. Brainstorm with the boss or
colleague. Working on something deeply especially if we
enjoy it, can help us reduce so much of the stress of the
day. Action creates positive emotion within us forcing us to
leave behind the stress that comes with overthinking and
allows us to start creating a life that we want and a career
we wish to build.
Ultimately, reducing stress is not necessarily about quitting
the job and moving off to a faraway island (although that
does sound appealing). It’s about recognizing that we do
have control over our thoughts, our ideas and our actions.
And that control is never lost as long as we look within.
